Should teachers allow their students to “friend” them on Facebook? The Houston Chronicle, following up on a local story of an ex-school aide accused of having sexual exchanges with a 16-year-old former student he contacted online, asks where teachers should draw the line.
Opinions are mixed. Opponents fear innocent educators will be branded sexual predators for chatting with students online, while proponents caution against overreacting to a powerful communication tool.
Most school districts, says the Chronicle, have yet to “define the rules of virtual engagement. In the Houston area, many districts block access to social-networking sites on campus computers, but they don’t have policies addressing after-hours use between educators and students.”
Having current and former students as Facebook friends could be a particularly sensitive issue for KIPP charter schools and others where teachers are encouraged to give students their cell phone numbers. KIPP co-founder Mike Feinberg tells the Chronicle he limits his Facebook contacts to alumni. “My personal threshold,” he says, “is not to accept friends on Facebook from KIPP-sters until they are in college.” But Joseph Miller who runs the KIPP to College program tells the paper Facebook is a great way to keep in touch with current and former students.
Comments from teachers following the story show strongly divided opinions. Says one, “Here’s the thing; a teacher is NOT a student’s “friend.” It’s called professionalism.” Echoes another, “As a teacher of 8 years, I have never had the desire or the need to communicate with my students directly outside of the classroom. If I have an issue concerning absenteeism, behavior, or academics with my students that can not be handled in class, then I go directly to the parents and make them at least aware of the issue and leave it to them to accept their responsibility as a parent to raise their own child.” However another teacher who uses Facebook points out,
“I teach at a school, however, where most students don’t have this kind of [parental] support at home, either because the parents are working multiple jobs or there’s something negative going on. I don’t seek my students out, but do let them “friend” me if they like. This does not mean that we are FRIENDS. It does let me keep an extra eye on them and make sure they are not doing/saying things they’re not supposed to. They find ways to slyly let me know that they appreciate that there’s someone who admonishes them with they curse, etc.”
Ultimately the question of to friend or not to friend becomes a proxy for the nature of the teacher/student relationship. As another teacher on the Chronicle site puts it:
I am a teacher and it’s a long time coming that people wake up and realize that professionalism doesn’t mean de-humanizing yourself. A lot of times kids need to know that a teacher is human. Too many times teachers come into the classroom thinking that all the are going to do is teach. That’s the wrong assumption. Teachers are counselors, motivators, nurses aides, even temporary banks when kids forget their lunch money. Wouldn’t a parent want to know that their kids had a teacher like that?…We have to realize that this is the way the kids communicate. Most of my students are far more techno savvy than I am and have mobile applications for facebook on their iphones and smartphones. They are always on the go and this is the mode of communication. It’s a major communication shift that not just teachers, but more people need to learn how to integrate into our lives. The days of waiting for the land line phone to ring to get info are no more.
In the alternative certification program I went through, the New York City Teaching Fellows, one of the oft-repeated homilies was “students have to know that you care before they care what you know.” While we were never explicity told to engage with our students after hours, playing basketball with kids after school, or taking them to a museum on the weekend was taken as proof of our commitment and praised. On the other hand, the message was decidedly mixed: we were also warned explicitly never to allow ourselves to be in a classroom alone with a student with the door closed for any reason.
Robert, you bring up important questions: (1) What kinds of contact between teachers and students are appropriate; and (2) how do online networks affect our relationships, personal and professional?
Like you, I received mixed messages in ed school. On the one hand, we were warned against being alone with a child at any time. On the other, we heard about teachers who went beyond the call of duty, making house visits, taking parents and children on trips, etc.
Once I wanted to provide tutoring for a mother and two daughters, at the school, on Saturday morning during regular Saturday school hours. The principal said absolutely not, because if anything happened during the tutoring, the school would be liable.
The “right answer” depends somewhat on school culture, but I would lean toward a certain distance and professionalism. It’s possible to show caring without making home visits or giving out one’s number for homework help. I used to let my students call me with questions; while they never abused the privilege, I don’t do that any more.
Now, online networks bring additional complications because of the notion of “friends.” I dislike the way the term “friend” is used on MySpace, Facebook, etc. My high school classmates have recently formed a group on Facebook and asked me to join. While it is great to be in contact with people and to read their news, I find Facebook a bit overwhelming and confusing. Who are your real friends? Does instant contact of this sort (with photos, updates, etc.) bring people closer together, or does it trivialize contact?
Because of the ambiguities of online networks, I am against using them to communicate with my students. I have never approved a friend request from a student and do not expect to do so. Perhaps there could be some sort of online network that recognizes the distinction between teacher and student… but I cringe at the thought of yet another network, with profiles, settings, and notifications!
Everyday Facebook becomes more important in our lives, not just our students. The question turns on whether Facebook is your place to inform YOUR party buddies on your escapades (which means no friends with students, current or former) or seeing yourself as a teacher,with a friendly, professional, honest presence: ordinary photos, no glamour photos, etc..
It may be easy to say that a professional Facebook is obvious for teachers. Ain’t so. New teachers frequently arrive with a strong party background. They will need to establish another professional account, which isn’t fun from a Facebook user perspective, but can easily done by using two different browsers (eg Firefox and Safari) at the same time.
I think what schools really need to do is provide guidelines to teachers about what can be on the teacher’s Facebook site if they want to “friend” students, and who other “friends” can be.
I handle this as Dennis suggests–I do friend students (these are college students remember, which of course makes a difference) but once I did so I bore in mind what I posted on my FB page. Not that it would have been all that different anyway. . .
I do what Feinberg says: I’ll accept a friend request from our high school students only after they graduate and are in college.
Some college professors I know are using Facebook as an online repository for teaching materials. Some HS teachers may be doing this, too.
If this is the reason for friending students–and the only reason–then it could be seen as acceptable.
Otherwise, I would suggest the following guidelines: Grad students yes, UG no, HS absolutely not.